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waitingman15 days straight in Debtors Prison & counting...
While I'll admit it's not the most hectic of jobs & what's required of me is well below my capabilities... & it's a 10 minute drive from home ~ even though I walk there most days now ~ it's getting to me at the moment. Probably just through sheer repetition, not just turning up there every day, but from the daily battle to get things done, achieved & finished with the money in the till... safe... bank... whatever, that's causing the attrition.
Once again, I think I have unerringly found a management team/structure that's overstretched itself through grandiose vision & self-inflicted proctologically induced carbon-monoxide poisoning (blowing smoke up their own arses). They're overextended & they know it. 3 stores in Sydney & half our suppliers have cut us off ~ leaving orders outstanding indefinitely & delivery dates determined by ouija board instead of calendar.
I've often joked with various members of the family owners that the last decent, capable person they hired was me... except I'm serious & those of you who've read my tales of the last 2 staff to cross the Prison threshold would have no trouble believing it. Trouble is, I'm now the only one there, with no guarantee of any more staff any time soon. The place isn't doing well enough to support three workers, but comfortable enough for two... chance would be a fine thing. Running a 3-storey warehouse/showroom on one's own is stressful enough without having any confidence in the ability to obtain & deliver what I'm supposed to be selling. I know I'm good at my job ~ hell, after 20-odd years in sales, how could I not be, but the cold facts are that the average retail wage is crap, I'm trying to maintain a better lifestyle afforded me by my proper path & previous jobs (OBluV8 costs a fortune each month to keep, let alone run) & be damned if I'll slide backwards without a fight... but I'm not sure I'm winning.
The Catch-22 is, whilst I'm working every day, I have no time to organise interviews with any other potential employers on my proper 'career path' &, let's be honest, salary bracket & the longer this goes on, the lower my energy levels get, so the less I try to find other jobs & the less I try, the more time goes by & the more out-of-the-loop I get, which sends the confidence levels plummeting, which...
...Means I pull 21 day stretches to keep my bills paid ~ or at least keep the 'Overdue' notices at a manageable level.
And there have been casualties along the way. Self-doubt & self-esteem issues have caused collateral damage & even if I knew how to fix that, I have no idea when I'd be able to. Pursuits, people & pastimes that once provided genuine pleasure now seem too much like hard work for not enough reward & I find myself either walking away or finding excuses to avoid them entirely. I haven't seen or contacted my oldest friend for coming up on 6 months now ~ missed both our birthdays & am now almost too nervous to re-establish ties... if I really wanted to.
And yet... I still function. I can still help other people ~ welcome distractions from my own life that they are. I haven't sunk into a self-pitying alcoholic or drug-induced stuporous haze & still believe this is only temporary...
I've been better. But I'm okay.
Tomorrow night, I promise I'll post some photos instead.
While I'll admit it's not the most hectic of jobs & what's required of me is well below my capabilities... & it's a 10 minute drive from home ~ even though I walk there most days now ~ it's getting to me at the moment. Probably just through sheer repetition, not just turning up there every day, but from the daily battle to get things done, achieved & finished with the money in the till... safe... bank... whatever, that's causing the attrition.
Once again, I think I have unerringly found a management team/structure that's overstretched itself through grandiose vision & self-inflicted proctologically induced carbon-monoxide poisoning (blowing smoke up their own arses). They're overextended & they know it. 3 stores in Sydney & half our suppliers have cut us off ~ leaving orders outstanding indefinitely & delivery dates determined by ouija board instead of calendar.
I've often joked with various members of the family owners that the last decent, capable person they hired was me... except I'm serious & those of you who've read my tales of the last 2 staff to cross the Prison threshold would have no trouble believing it. Trouble is, I'm now the only one there, with no guarantee of any more staff any time soon. The place isn't doing well enough to support three workers, but comfortable enough for two... chance would be a fine thing. Running a 3-storey warehouse/showroom on one's own is stressful enough without having any confidence in the ability to obtain & deliver what I'm supposed to be selling. I know I'm good at my job ~ hell, after 20-odd years in sales, how could I not be, but the cold facts are that the average retail wage is crap, I'm trying to maintain a better lifestyle afforded me by my proper path & previous jobs (OBluV8 costs a fortune each month to keep, let alone run) & be damned if I'll slide backwards without a fight... but I'm not sure I'm winning.
The Catch-22 is, whilst I'm working every day, I have no time to organise interviews with any other potential employers on my proper 'career path' &, let's be honest, salary bracket & the longer this goes on, the lower my energy levels get, so the less I try to find other jobs & the less I try, the more time goes by & the more out-of-the-loop I get, which sends the confidence levels plummeting, which...
...Means I pull 21 day stretches to keep my bills paid ~ or at least keep the 'Overdue' notices at a manageable level.
And there have been casualties along the way. Self-doubt & self-esteem issues have caused collateral damage & even if I knew how to fix that, I have no idea when I'd be able to. Pursuits, people & pastimes that once provided genuine pleasure now seem too much like hard work for not enough reward & I find myself either walking away or finding excuses to avoid them entirely. I haven't seen or contacted my oldest friend for coming up on 6 months now ~ missed both our birthdays & am now almost too nervous to re-establish ties... if I really wanted to.
And yet... I still function. I can still help other people ~ welcome distractions from my own life that they are. I haven't sunk into a self-pitying alcoholic or drug-induced stuporous haze & still believe this is only temporary...
I've been better. But I'm okay.
Tomorrow night, I promise I'll post some photos instead.
