Client Quote Of (Every) Day

Him: "Hi, I need some parts for my barbecue."
Me: "Certainly, what do you need?"
Him: "I was talking to someone yesterday & I need the things that go over the thing."
Me: "........." (but that's not what I was thinking)

Fortunately, I'm a pretty good sales detective & can read basic sign language, so I knew what he meant by the way he flapped his hands around trying to illustrate his requirements.

Oh god... & it's only my Monday...

Edit ~ And another one!!

Him: "My wife was in here last week looking at a table... is this it?"
Me: ".........."

Sob... GET ME OUT OF HERE!!!